sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
