Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Never underestimate the power of titties
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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