So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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