I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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