Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
