I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
