she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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