So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
