Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
