I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
