So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
