well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Randomize
