I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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