New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
