I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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