yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
