You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
