Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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