My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
