The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Randomize
