I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Randomize