Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
organizing the empties. That sober.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
