Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
