I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My cat gives me a boner
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
