we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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