I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
