its not stalking. its research.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
