How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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