Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
