I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
