Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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