If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Randomize
