i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
And then the night went full on bisexual.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
