She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
