we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
We need a shit load of segways right now
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
