Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
