Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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