you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
