I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
