Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
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