That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
