come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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