is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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