I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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