ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
