i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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