but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
