I hate all girls vehemently.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
