That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
