Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
